“Africa changes you forever, like nowhere on earth. Once you have been there, you will never be the same. But how do you describe its magic to someone who has never felt it? How can you explain the fascination of the vast, dusty continent, whose oldest roads are elephant paths? Could it be because Africa is the place of all our beginnings, the cradle of mankind, where our species first stood upright on the savannahs of long ago?” -Brian Jackson.
Today, I woke up early, still on Kenya time. Maybe it’s because I still want to be there—waking up to monkeys and baboons trying to enter my room, seeing the massive Mount Kilimanjaro rising out of the savannah where elephants graze, or being in the present moment with people so genuine and happy. Kenya impacted my heart and soul. And before I forget this feeling, I am taking a moment to reflect on the experience.
It is the connection that struck me the most:
Connection to Each Other
Connection to Mother Earth and a Higher Power
Connection to Ourselves
I was grateful to experience Kenya with my mom, Claudia, my daughter, Carmella, and other women at the Harvard Women and Power Summit. There were 57 of us in the group; many brought a plus one. A contingent of 5 girls, ages 11-16, were considered “Girls and Power,” joined us, with two afternoons planned just for them. For two days, they were joined by Elsie, a local Kenyan girl aged 13, and her mom, Josephine, a teacher.
The trip to Kenya was long — a one-hour flight to NY, then 13.5 hours to Nairobi, with a 5.5-hour layover in between. We took the reverse route to return. We spent many hours traveling in safari Land Cruisers with the most knowledgeable drivers.
Onto my thoughts about the experience...
Connection to Each Other
When we can truly connect to another human being, it is life-changing. Every connection is life-changing. This may sound like an extreme statement or an exaggeration, but it's true. Several times during our journey in Kenya, we made the choice to connect. We could have sat back and observed the beautiful landscape or listened to speakers speak. Instead, we choose to engage. These are my reflections on the human connection we experienced in Kenya.
Drive to Amboseli
During our five-hour drive from Nairobi to Amboseli, we saw extreme poverty. Skinny cows grazed the roadside, children tended their herds of goats, and men and women risked their lives selling fruit or homemade slingshots in the middle of a two-lane road. We saw kids running to our vehicle with their hands out, asking for sweets. Many wore shoes made of motorcycle tires and had dirty clothes. Before I went to Kenya, I expected to be deeply emotionally affected by this poverty and thought I would want to give them money or possessions to cheer them up. But something unexpected happened — I felt sadness for myself and those consumed by material life.
As we drove by, we locked eyes with these children and adults, yelled, “Jambo!” and gave our biggest smiles. They would always give us a big wave and yell, “Jambo!” back, even if we didn’t stop to give the kids sweets or notebooks that time. My daughter and the other girls on the trip never tired of waving and connecting with the kids on the side of the road. They put their hands out to wave so often that the driver kept reminding them to keep their arms inside the vehicle because cars and trucks would pass so closely to us.
My daughter, struck by their happiness, said, “Mom, they don’t have much, but they are so happy, every one of them. They are so happy.” They were genuinely happy. The girls also remarked that this kind of friendliness and connection rarely happens in the States. It was a lesson for all of us: connection is about presence, not possessions.
The Conservation Kenya Camp for Girls.
“Kenyan conservation will not work unless we spend time with the people, understanding their aspirations, pain and disappointment” - Dr Winnie Kiiru.
Dr. Winnie invited us to her Camp for Girls, where we experienced life at camp by planting trees, beading, singing, and connecting. This camp is a lifeline for so many girls, many who have dropped out of school by 12 or 13 years old due to being married off. They also escape to the camp after running away to avoid female genitalia mutualization (FGM), a practice that is prohibited by more and more elders of the Maasai tribes but still exists. My daughter was beading with another girl her age who was wearing a wedding ring on her finger. She couldn’t imagine that girl’s life, yet the girl still smiled and was teaching her to bead.
The girls on both sides were hungry to interact and experience each other’s presence. They greeted us with their music and practiced their English, which they spoke so well! Dr. Winnie is one of the most inspiring people I have ever met. I hope to learn how others and I can work alongside Winnie to support the girls’ camp. Maybe through financial donations or a girls' exchange program, where we send girls to her camp, and her girls visit the States. I'm not sure exactly, but I am setting an intention to do future work with Winnie. Developing strong, powerful girls who are authentic and unconditionally supportive of each other is my passion.
The Massai and Kenyan People
I am beyond grateful to have connected with the Massai people and fallen in love with them. One of my favorite experiences during the trip was tracking lions with the Maasai Lion Guardians. These warriors taught us about the lions, escorted us through their land, and took us to the lions. But along the way, they also connected and laughed with us.
At one point, I noticed what looked like an odd-looking gun and asked them what it was. They said that it was an infrared flashlight used to spot lions at night. They thought it was hilarious that I called it a gun and pretended to shoot us with the laser with such laughter! It was a genuine connection. I asked for some photos of the interaction so I could tell all my friends that we were captured at gunpoint by some Maasai warriors. They laughed so hard! The irony of it was that our lives were truly in their hands. We were in their vehicle in the middle of the bush of Kenya, tracking lions. My favorite part of that day was not actually seeing the lions but connecting with the Lion Guardians. Humor brought us together.
The Maasai people live simply. They travel for days with their herds of cattle and goats with nothing more than a machete and a stick. They don’t carry water bottles or snacks. They may drink blood from a cow if hungry or thirsty, but just enough to sustain themselves and not impact the cow. Their livestock are their assets, so just as you don’t ask a person how much money they have, you don’t ask a Maasai how many cows they have. When they need money, their cows act as an ATM. They sell a cow to get the money they need to pay for school fees for their children or buy necessary items for their homes. They seem to live in the moment and have so much joy. Their smiles were full of happiness.
Lastly, I am impressed by how the Kenyan people welcomed us. It was my birthday while we were there. The Ol Tukai staff sang to me and three other women who were also celebrating birthdays. They made us a huge 8-layer cake! They didn’t know us, but they celebrated us. It was a birthday to remember for sure.
Connection to Mother Earth and a Higher Power
For the first few days, I think we were all overwhelmed. We were in Nairobi, a fast-paced city, and I needed time to get grounded and connect spiritually. I felt as if I was stuck on the plane, still at 30,000ft. This is common for me, being in the rat race of life. It is a lot of juggling between running a business, managing a household, and maintaining my sanity. "Who needs a carpool tomorrow to lacrosse practice?" "What is the status of that presentation for the upcoming workshop?" I was able to clear my calendar and workload to be in Kenya, but I also needed to get grounded there. Here is how I found that...
Grounding in Amboseli
I got glimpses of it in Nairobi, but it wasn’t until we landed in Amboseli that I could anchor into the earth. Dr. Leela Hazzah, co-founder of the Lion Guardians, honored me to lead the Women and Power group through a grounding and reflection exercise. Brooklin Armaro, my business operations manager, and I developed a Reflection Journal that was provided to all attendees. Our goal was simple: connecting everyone to Earth and their higher power. It was also a lesson on control and how little we can actually control.
I started with a meditation/grounding exercise where everyone would lie on Maasai blankets, feel the earth, and settle into stillness. What I didn’t account for was mischievous monkeys and baboons! They saw us as a bunch of suckers with fun stuff to steal. As we tried to settle in, they would steal our stuff and run off with it! We tried several times to get going, but they kept coming back. We had to have a few women stand watch while the rest got grounded. There were also bugs and acacia tree thorns to contend with. Then, during our small group discussions, the rain came, bringing a complete downpour. Luckily, we quickly shifted into a conference room, but the experience was very insightful. Welcome to Amboseli National Park, where Mother Earth is in charge, not you. Whether it is the animals, weather, or trees, we are just little beings on a big Earth.
Whenever I connect spiritually, I often cry. There is no explanation for the tears. They don’t represent an emotion but rather a moment when I feel the presence of a higher power, whether that is God, my guides, an angel, or my silly imaginary friends from childhood. Several times during the trip, the tears came, especially in the presence of Winnie. As my mom put it, I wouldn’t be surprised if she won the Nobel Peace Prize one day. Her peaceful presence and love were unreal. Even as I write this, my eyes are welling up. I want to partner with her on these projects. She is someone spiritually led to change the world in a loving way. I felt a higher presence in several moments with the other Women and Power ladies.
Monkey Madness
My mom and daughter also had some up close and personal experiences with the monkeys and baboons at Ol Tukai. My mom and I departed one morning for a hot air balloon ride, while Carmella decided to skip it and stayed back at the hotel. A baboon opened the door while she was in the room and let himself in. It stole two croissants, a few granola bars, and some crackers. He then sat there, eating the crackers while staring at her. She finally figured out how to get him out of the room, but the baboon sat on the front porch eating the stolen goods. She called me during this fiasco, hysterical. I was in the middle of nowhere, about to board the balloon, unable to do anything to support her. She discovered her power that morning. She grew a little more confident, and I was quite proud.
My mom also had an encounter while sitting by the pool when a monkey grabbed some notecards right out of her hands! He also took a bag of souvenirs. She was able to get both back, but dang, those monkeys are bold.
Animal Kingdom
There were also the animals — so many elephants, giraffes, cheetahs, hyenas, cape buffalo, flamingoes, lions, zebras, gazelles, impala, ostrich, hippopotami, rhinos, and even catfish. We saw so many baby animals that were huge yet still so fragile. We learned that orphaned elephants get very stressed, so the staff at the Sheldrick Wildlife Trust sleep in their pens with them at night. We feed baby giraffes at the Giraffe Center, and if you ignore them, they will headbutt you to get your attention. We also heard a baby cheetah calling out for their mom a few feet away and saw a baby hippopotamus grazing with its mama.
Luckily, we saw no dangerous snakes, but the fear was real! The animals in Kenya are in charge. We are the caged animals living in their world, and they pause to view us in our cage (the Landcruiser). There is a rule that you are not allowed to get out of the vehicle, and you aren’t even allowed to put your hand outside. By respecting Mother Earth and all her beautiful, raw, big, fragile, and scary creations, we realized we are just a tiny part of a bigger ecosystem that we have little control over.
Connection to Ourselves
Being in Kenya felt a little like being home. Not because I am from Kenya but because I needed to be far away from home to connect with myself. I often get lost in the minutia and forget what is important. I try to control things or give my energy to people I shouldn’t. But in Kenya, I didn't lose focus. Being there made me reconnect with myself. I found myself full of gratitude, loved myself without judgment, gave myself grace, let go of judgments, was more mindful, and was present in the moment. I had no to-do list or concept of time.
Some attendees criticized the event for a lack of traditional programming and the constant flexing of the schedule. It was unfortunate for those unable to see the value of connecting with a child tending their herds or those who require so much structure and control that they cannot see the value of being flexible and allowing what will be to be. The value isn't sitting in a climate controlled conference room. The value is immersing ourselves in a different culture and different environment. It is being in the bush with the Maasai, listening and asking questions. It is being quiet and still as a journey of giraffes pass by. It is being present in the momen. I had to trust that I was exactly where I needed to be. I had to view the entire experience from a different perspective. I was able to connect in a new way to myself, my surroundings, a higher power, and to others. I was able to take time reflect on the impact of the experience and its impact on my personal and professional life. This is why I went. I went to grow which will only help my work, my clients, my family, my relationships, and have a more positive impact on the world.
This was not a vacation or just sightseeing. This was an immersion into a world where we can learn so much if we give ourselves the choice.
This was a journey of connection:
To Others
To Mother Earth
To a Higher Power
To Ourselves
I am very grateful for this opportunity and all the hard work of the planning committee, our hosts in Kenya, George and his staff of Sandrage Safaris, the Maasai people, and all the staff we interacted with along the way. We were able to access places I never could have imagined. I hope to return sometime soon.
“When you leave Africa, as the plane lifts, you feel that more than leaving a continent, you’re leaving a state of mind. Whatever awaits you at the other end of your journey will be of a different order of existence.” - Francesca Marciano.
With Gratitude,
Patti
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